(written by Chris...aka Emily's very own Marlboro Man)
For those of you who don’t know, and as a future reference, a couple can play for a total of $28 at Hanging Rock Golf Club on Sunday’s after 3 o’clock…toddlers are on the house. In case you haven’t heard already, Emily was gracious enough to venture out to the golf course with Sam and I a couple weeks ago for the Jack N’ Jill Special in Salem. This was also after much prodding from me to come witness “The Natural” – aka Sam, who is probably 1-2 years from legitimately beating me on the golf course. So, as I sit on the couch with Sam watching “Special Agent Oso” making up a song about Charley’s poopie diaper – I thought I would take the lead on this belated blog topic.
I won’t give you the hole-by-hole (I’ll spare you those details), however there are a few highlights that I’ll mention, and I will preface this by saying that even though Sam was cranking it that Sunday afternoon, we all know this day was about Emily’s return to the game – a 4-year hiatus ever since she was pregnant with Sam. This was her day. Her best previous score…a 108 at the same course. Also, and Ryan will appreciate this since he taught me, I can assure you every stroke was accounted for and every rule was followed.
Emily prepared – she had practiced in the yard with whiffle balls while enduring some hard lessons from Sam “Snead” Dowdy himself. No joke, Sam told her to keep her head down (a great tip, and something Emily was actually doing wrong!) during her practice session. I think I even learned something that afternoon. We packed a cooler full of waters, special juices (Capri Sun – don’t ask), chips, granola bars, crackers and gummi sharks. Even still, I knew a hole would come when the proverbial towel would make it’s appearance and Emily would call it a day – she would get tired, her hands would hurt, she would get hungry – or a combination of all 3. Ooooh, but this day would be one for the ages.
Let’s fast forward (because Sissy seriously crapped her pants and I’ve got to wrap this up before I have to Febreeze our entire living room)…Emily isn’t playing that bad…she has had her fair share of doubles, some triples, maybe a quad in there, but she’s rebounded those holes with a handful of pars as well. The par 5 #10 comes and she loses her first ball OB. She has been constantly worried about playing slow all day and I know I’ll never get her at 100% focus…however, if she was going to quit, it was going to be now. The excuses started to reveal themselves, BUT, she battled. After taking a quad on #10, a triple on #11, she was at her breaking point. I put a little William Wallace (Braveheart…follow me) on her to motivate and I felt confident it would take about 20 minutes to settle her down…like an Advil. Before you know it, we were on the par 3 #15 and Emily has a birdie putt – she 2 putts for a par and she’s on the homestretch.
Fast forward again to #18 – a par 3 signature hole that is STRAIGHT downhill – like you’re teeing off from the top of a waterfall. Before the hole, she adds her score up and states that she needs a par to get a 107 and beat her best score ever – a bogey will tie. Needless to say, I wasn’t so sure she was feeling confident. Her tee shot with a pitching wedge didn’t make things any better. Struck well, but it found itself in the long rough left of the hole, but pin high. She probably had a 15-yard chip with very little green to work with (pin was in the back left). Little did I know I had married a much younger and incredibly more attractive version of Tom Watson – never thought I would say that (still feels awesome to say though). A couple final pointers (she already knew) and Emily puts the sweetest chip swing on the ball you could manage from there – she hits the exact spot on the fringe that she had pointed out – and rolls the freakin’ ball into the hole! A birdie on 18! A 106 on the day! Hugs abound – Emily chucks her wedge, sprints over to me (my wedge was also chucked) and the embrace began. Sam sprints over for a family version and the celebration was on. It was nuts – I was so proud. There were 2 guys on the tee to witness – both the chip in and the national championship after-party. I’m pretty sure Emily waved to some invisible fans and tossed her ball into the “crowd.”
I will never forget that Sunday afternoon – it’s will be forever engrained in my head like the theme song to “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.” So, until next time…”Oh Tootles!”
Husband of Marlboro Woman
